Lagu Tehbotol =)

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Listen on posterous

Hai teman-teman jagalah kesehatan, jangan lupa gosok gigi dengan komodo. Eh, kok jadi nyanyi dan beriklan. Maap, jayus karena panas-yang-tak-bertuan-di-hari-senin-sore. Ya, saya mengerti jam-jam ini adalah jam-jam jahanam. Untuk itu izinkanlah saya oleh ridho Yang Maha Kuasa menghibur saudara-saudari semua lewat sebuah lagu singkat yang saya rekam dari salah satu pengamen unggulan saya di kawasan Muara Karang, tepatnya sepanjang soto Bang Mamat. Judul tembang ini adalah Lagu Tehbotol. Namun bukan sembarang teh saudara-saudara. Teh apa itu, silahkan anda simak di bawah. Semoga menghibur yeee. Kalo engga yee maap maap sodare sodare. Hehe

(Untuk kenikmatan maksimal, maksimalkan pula volume laptop anda atau gunakan headphone =)

The Marshmallow Test (Patience Has Its Reward)

Dr. Walter Mischel from Stanford University conducted an extensive research on psychology more than forty years ago. In one of the study, a researcher came into a room with a four-year-old kid, presented him/her a marshmallow and tell him/her this “you can have the marshmallow now, or you can wait for fifteen minutes while I run some errands and when I come back, you can have two instead.”

As expected, some of the kids ate the marshmallow at the very second the guy left the room, some of them waited for a while then ate them. However, there are also a group of kids that waited for the whole fifteen minutes. They distract themselves by closing their eyes, singing a song, or even tried sleeping. Eventually the researcher came back and they can have two. You can have a look at the replicated study in the five-minute video below:

http://www.youtube.com/v/amsqeYOk--w&hl=en&fs=1

The study did not end there. About fourteen years after, Dr. Walter Mischel made another study on the group of kids that patiently waited for two marshmallows. The result was astoundingly shocking as these kids generally grew up to be better adjusted, more popular, adventurous, confident and dependable teenagers. And not only that, on another further test, they scored an average of 210 points higher in their SAT compared to the other group of kids.

The marshmallow experiment is a simple reminder to not get distracted with things that are tempting but not important.

It also displays patience (aside from many other lessons). In life, how often we fall for the temptation of raising up our voice, pulling out the harsh-demeaning words, and forgoing the chance to cultivate a long-term fruitful relationship. We easily curse on people, our subordinates, or partner simply to shout out our superiority, our pride, but how long does the superiority and the pride stands? It quickly vanished the moment that person left the room. When we show patience, we acknowledged everyone is imperfect, and at the same time we give room for progress.

To sum up, in Gary Chapman’s words “…when we love authentically, our attitude reflects on our ability to focus on what is most important at the moment and patiently wait when necessary”. What is more important might means the project that you are working with your colleague, or the constructive relationship you can have with your partner or your spouse. So, when the temptation arise, know that patience has its reward.

Smile on, shine on. = )

(DON'T) JUST DO IT!

MAY2006
75KG. Overweight alarm! Muffin belly. Double chin. Hit the gym. Lost total of 7-8 KG after 3 months. More exercises since then.

OCTOBER2009
MRI Result: diagnosed with a pinched nerve on the fifth lumbar. In short = terrible backpain.

LESSONSLEARNED
Don't just do it. You might get the results like I did. I did lost the weight I wanted, but who knows that apparently some of my heavylifting activities (I might have lifted more weight than I supposed to or simply used a wrong lifting stance) has now cost me my backbone and future physical fitness. The fact is I didn't have trainer, I simply asked a friend who's been practicing for a while to assist me. I'm glad with the fact that I overcame that overweight phase, but then again, I might have lost the same weight by doing any other less-dangerous sports. Now, after three years the backpain is what I got. As for now, I still can't do much strenuous work. I'm not allowed to carry heavy stuff (not even my own laptop), I've been sleeping on bed topped with flat-wood for weeks (yeap I feel Japanese already and their tatami). I can’t sit longer than one hour. I have to walk twice slower than I used to. And don’t mention the hurtful acupuncture session.

If you ever going to push yourself into leaving your comfort zone and pursue a goal, whatever it is, I’m sure it’s for your good, don’t just simply do it. But do it right. It is much more important to step back a while and learn and know how to do it right rather than rushing it and having the regrettable after-effect some time after.

APPLIES TO

Many things. The closest that come to my mind is starting a relationship. You know that rush-of-blood-to-the-heart you have when you’re falling in love. As a normal dude you’ll find a hard time repressing those feelings and to be aggressive is who we are. And you rushed into that commitment while maybe its not your season yet. As one of my friend quoted “Love when you’re ready, not when you’re lonely”. And by ready it means know how to treat your girl right, know your partner well (at least you gotta know how she’ll be when she’s angry otherwise the shock and the negativitywill tremendously doubled when you’re already in a relationship), know your borders, know if you can manage the time, know if you’re financially okay (no girls will pay for your dinner dude), and such and such. Have you ever consider those stuff before starting a relationship? I did to the smallest details and yet I still screw up here and there. What if I just jump and do it? Worse? Better? Well, you can figure out the mathematics.

I can think of another hundreds application of this in real life, but I promised to make this short enough to trigger your thinking and let your mind ponder, digest, and relate it to your own life.

Don’t just do it. Do it right! Its not only about making a start, but also how well you finish.

Smile on, shine on!

 

I'm Happy If You're Happy

Found this link from Otjep post on Facebook. Fell in love with the short-movie and the beautiful message it brings.
Smile on, shine on!

http://www.youtube.com/v/Cbk980jV7Ao&hl=en&fs=1

Twitter 101 (Kenali Fiturnya Lebih Baik Lagi)

Yang terhormat-terkasih-dan-tersayang kawan-kawan, saudara-saudari dan handai-taulan semua yang berada dalam timeline saya, izinkanlah sayamenggunakan kesempatan ini untuk memberikan penyuluhan singkat seputar penggunaan Twitter berikut dengan fitur-fitur yang melengkapinya seperti RT, via, # (hashtag), dan lain sebagainya. Niscaya pada akhir tulisan singkat ini semua menjadi lebih baik dan alurwaktu (timeline) pun berangsur-angsur menjadi maksimal pemanfaatannya.

1. @replies
Fitur ini digunakan untuk membalas (reply) tweet teman anda yang anda follow. Orang lain yang tidak mem-follow anda dan teman anda tidak akan bisa membaca reply ini.

Contoh Kasus: akun twitter saya adalah captainruby. bila saya membalas teman saya seperti berikut

captainruby @henrygerson jo, g baru dapet @nuBmagz, ngambil d starbucks. hehe. cool review on soulnation!

Saya (captainruby) baru saja mereply secara langsung ke teman saya (henrygerson). Maka anda sebagai pihak ketiga hanya akan bisa melihat tweet ini (tweet ini hanya akan muncul di timeline anda) bila anda follow captainruby dan henrygerson.

2. RT (Re-Tweet)
RT atau fitur mengulang-tweet / retweet adalah fitur yang and gunakan jika (dan hanya jika) anda menemukan sebuah tweet (dari seseorang) yang layak dishare dengan followers anda (yang tidak mem-follow seseorang itu).

Contoh Kasus: kembali menggunakan akun saya seperti berikut

captainruby RT @shinta_s "Perasaan mengikuti keputusan (untuk mengampuni, untuk mencintai), its not the other way around" (JR)

Dalam situasi ini saya mengulang-tweet (retweet) teman saya shinta_s dengan anggapan quote'nya cukup berkesan dan ingin saya share dengan follower saya yang tidak follow shinta. Follower saya yang tidak follow shinta pun akan dapat membaca quote yang saya RT.

Kadang dalam RT kita menemukan username teman kita terlalu panjang sehingga kalimat akan erpotong (ya itu ada unsur kesengajaan disana =p) atau tweet itu sudah di-RT beberapa kali sehingga terlalu byk username. Untuk itu lazim bila anda (1) menghapus semua user name kecuali user dimana tweet itu bersumber (2) menyingkat kata" dalam tweet (misal: dengan menjadi dgn, saya menjadi sy, dll).

ATTENTION! Jadi RT itu bukan untuk digunakan setiap kali anda ingin membalas setiap tweet. (kecuali anda tak segan seluruh dunia membaca percakapan anda)

Contoh Kasus (penggunaan RT yang di-abuse / disalahgunakan – harap jangan ditiru):

captainruby yesyes! =) RT @shinta_s HOREE! Makasi cat RT @acallista upahmu besar di surga RT @willydarmawan: @cathprajino bakal traktir nonton astroboy sabtu nanti

3. # (hashtag)
Daripada berulang kali RT setiap tweet, lebih baik gunakan # (hashtag) dan diikuti dgn topic pembicaraan terakhir.

Contoh Kasus:

captainruby @sandyjaya makasih yah udah jauh-jauh beliin ampe ke singapur trus di engrave lagi, sungguh terharu #ipodtouch32gig

4. Favorite

Fitur yang terakhir ini memang kurang terekspos dan belum dimaksimalkan penggunaannya. Saya pribadi suka sekali dengan fitur ini, bahkan menurut saya jauh lebih baik dari RT-ing. Mengapa? Mudah saja, kalau sebuah quote itu cukup menggugah pemikiran saya, saya lebih suka menyimpannya sebagai favorite yang bisa saya kumpulkan dan dengan gampang dapat saya lihat kembali di list favorite saya. Inilah alasan kenapa saya jarang sekali RT, tapi mungkin anda temukan quote anda dalam list favorites saya.

Tampak seperti aturan yang panjang yah? Saya juga merasa begitu awalnya, namun bila diikuti alurnya dengan baik, lebih terasa sebagai sebuah guidance. Twitter bisa menjadi sarana yang sangat baik sesuai dengan konsep awalnya yang hadir sebagai micro-blogging site. Kini memang telah berkembang menjadi social-media site, alhasil banyak mis-use. Kembali kepada anda untuk menyesuaikan dan membuat twitter dan timeline aja menjadi lingkungan yang lebih baik atau tidak. Tidak ada paksaan dan tekanan. Saya hanya merasa teman-teman semua perlu tahu ini. Mari berdayakan 140 karakter kita dengan maksimal.

captainruby posterous people, tersenyumlah. bersinarlah. salam. rubs =)

 

 

Polaroid Sydney

I'm barely sleepy and its 1.00 am. So I played with http://www.rollip.com/start -- created a bunch of polaroid images. And ended up compiling a sort of goodbye-for-now-sydney-see-you-when-i-see-you kind of album. The one year I spent there was a rollercoaster, literally. The ride is always up first, followed by a huge slump, then jumpingjacks, twist-and-turn, all in all, only to go back to the same place I was a year ago, square one (with an extra Master Degree in Commerce though). It wasn't all sappy. In my own words, it was rainbow-ish. I got all the colors. There were some great moment as well. I guess when I have time, I'll narrate each of the photo. For the time being, enjoy. =)

See the full gallery on posterous

Appreciate (The Wisdom Of No)

Have you ever been in any of this situations:

CASE-1
You applied for a job. This is one of your top-five most wanted job. After posting your application, you waited those long hopeful hours. You stared at your cellphone day and night until it finally rings! You just won an interview. And you gave your best, you were one of the first arrived, you conquered all the questions tactfully. You gave everything only to find that three weeks after the interview, not a single person inform you (not even a phone call or text message) whether you are accepted or no.

CASE-2
Wednesday, noon, lunchtime. You are munching your chicken wings dipped in terasi-sambal-sauce. *ringring A customer calls you. You say to
your colleague "Ah, let them wait, its the only time of the day I can relax". But the phone keep ringing. And as a professional salesperson your heart couldn't resist anymore but to answer, hoping there'll be a sales lead. So you spend the next 15 min explaining your products, forgoing your decent meal. And another 20 min to write a proposal complete with price quotation and terms of payment. All is done only to find that your proposal e-mail is never replied with anything.

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Been in any situation with more or less similarity? Maybe the examples are a bit business-related. Let's try something simple. You asked 5 of your friends if they can make it for a quick dinner today. You called up early in the morning. Everyone's answered simply "hmm, i'm quite free, but im not too sure, i'd let you know if I can make it or not". Fast forward to 6 o'clock. Nobody replied. And you're already in the diner. As expected, nobody show up either. Gantung. Hanging on a string. It just bothered me. And I reject to blame this on "well it is the eastern-culture". NO! If something contains no positive value, should we continue it as a culture? And NO it is not culture. It's just us. And you can improve if you decide to.

The culture of late stuck with me for some time before, but it all changes when i start coming to my local church, JPCC who always start on time. When they say 12pm. Then the door is closed 11.45. After getting an uncomfortable seat for two or three times, I learned the hard lesson. Thankful for that though. We say its Indo-culture, I refuse that! Shame if we did nothing and accept it as it is. Coming on time means you appreciate people's time.

The same thing applies with the above example. Why let people uninformed and confused? Are we afraid of saying "no" to ineligible applications? Are we afraid of hurting others feeling when we reject a proposal? That is no excuse. I've been applying the opposite thing for quite some time. Whatever it is, whether I accept a patner's proposal or not, I inform them. Letting them know what our decision is -- yes or no -- that's appreciation to their effort. Imagine you are the company in case #1 would the candidate promote to a friend the products of the company (your company) that didn't inform anything to them? Hey, your company might also lose a potential candidate 5 years after when you make another opening. Would you care to answer another phone call from a neglectful partner? Or from another point-of-view, would anyone care to accept your phone call if you are that neglectful partner?

Sometimes even though its a "no", its much more appreciated if we let people know, rather than left them hanging on a string. You gain the person's respect and you let them know you appreciate them as well. It also represent your value -- professionalism, something that represented as your track record. A "no" can be a wise move to make. Especially in a long-term perspective.

I'D LIKE THAT! (a lesson from uncle john mayer)

These are the words of John Mayer from the live performance DVD - Any Given Thursday, enjoy and tell me what you think. I think it’s got some reality in it. As for the message, I rely it on you to entertain yourself. =)

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I was thinking about relationship as it pertains to songs about relationship. It occurred to me. I figured out a key to a relationship and how to make it work.

See, when you first meet somebody you find out they like you first of all. A friend of a friend of theirs tells you he or she really likes you. And it kills u, force you and sends you on the grounds. Then somehow you got her phone number. You call her up and start talking and at the end you say "well, thats a great phone conversation, can i see ya sometime?" and then they say this, they say "i’d like that.."

"i’d like that" makes u fall on the floor again, your heart about to stop. Nothing feels better than "i’d like that". So now, you blood presssure going, you are six feet off the ground, you can’t sleep because of "i’d like that".

So you’ve been hanging out for a while and you’ve been calling and talking on the phone all the time and then you drop the bomb or what feels like the bomb. You say, u know what … "i’ve been thinking about you a while". And she just went speechless and then you say "what?"… and she said "i’m sorry i’ve just… i’ve.. just.. i’ve been thinking about you too." BAM! higher than the sky. But now, "i’d like that"..DONE! Now you are up to "i’ve been thinking about you.. "

"I’d like that" doesn’t work anymore.

And then a few months past , whatever weeks, whatever makes you feel comfortable you say "I gotta tell you something.." you say this…. " i’m in love with you…" and nothing in the world sounds better than i’m in love with you and maybe she starts crying.

Now what doesn’t work? "i’d like that" and "i’ve been thinking about you"

Now fast forward you start saying "i love you a lot", six weeks, six months, now you are like… "i wanna marry u, i wanna impregnant u with my love, damn! words just doesn’t work anymore..". and then you say this line, you know you’ve used this line before "i just wish they put a new word in the dictionary bigger than love because love just doesn’t describe what i fee!."

And so then now he/she start asking "do you love me?" and you start going "of course i love you, i’ll say it twice, i’ll say it three times", and then you cross a really interesting point where all of the sudden comes "i hate you, i hate you". And they are saying "i hate you a lot" and she’s goin "we’re over!!" u say "no we’re not!"

Now the words do not work at all, completely meaningless, it doesn’t work anymore, you are throwing punches under water and you know you are done.

You know what the moral of the story is? If there’s any… Never ever underestimate the power of "i’d like that"!
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